Blondecisions
Tuesday, March 30, 2004
Meat Aversion
It's not just vegetarians who get grossed out by butcher talk :)
I have a SERIOUS aversion to raw meat. My dh has to prepare things like meatloaf ahead of time for me and put it in a covered pan in the fridge so I can cook it up that week.
I HATE the sight of thawing meat, and can't eat if anyone reminds me of what I am eating. I literally hold my breath when dumping raw meat into a pan and fuhgetaboutit if I have to TOUCH the meat to cut it up.
While eating, if one of my kids mentions anything about the meat in its original form, talks about a bone, or makes any other innocent comment, I have to hold back the spew and leave the table to start the dishes.
It's unfortunate because when I am ignorant and blocking it out, I enjoy meats. But if reminded, I cannot eat it.
My dh says I am a prime candidate for veganism.
Monday, March 29, 2004
Taylor Update
I've started a blog for journaling my son's disorder (we believe him to be Bipolar). I don't know, I suppose it's for help in healing. I've been pretty consumed lately myself, so I need some bloodletting to heal. I need to get this poison out so I can be what he needs me to be.
We think he'll be admitted to a hospital about 40 minutes from here. I call it the Betty Ford Clinic for kids. I don't know if it will be a few days or... I think more like a couple of weeks.
He's very unstable and the progression in his problems is horrifyingly fast!
The first time I called them in mid-February, I basically told them off when they said he would need admission. And now suddenly I find myself hoping he will be, for his sake. For the whole family's sake.
Feet feet feet, and when you have feet, you must have shoes!
What is my fascination with feet and shoes? Not just any feet, since I really hate feet on adults. I could never have a foot fetish, unless that means staying away from as many feet as possible.
No, I mean the feet of my boys. I was utterly fascinated by their feet when they were born. So pink and tiny and wrinkly. But I've never lost that fascination, and watched their feet grow with love, and horror. How could little boys have such BIG feet?
The length of their feet measures their life, and I am left saddened by the tragedy of buying new shoes.
Normally I LOVE new shoes. I am one of those who feels the shoes make a person and no, I don't buy $300 shoes, but I do require my sneakers look clean and come with a name brand. My shoes I buy from Payless or wherever I can find size 12 shoes for women.
Just like my own sneakers, I require name brands for the boys. Yesterday we went to Dicks for new shoes (I love their clearance rack) and my whole size = life measurement tragedy was put temporarily on hold as I squawked, "Alex!!! Why didn't you TELL me your boots were so small?!"
I'd placed a finger on the toe of his boot to see if the size he wore still gave enough room and was horrifyed to feel his toes jammed up and knuckles clearly bent. I would never mutter (out loud) that my son is a moron, but my gawd! He was wearing size 13 boots (that I had just bought in October or November) and was actually a size 2.
The boy was wearing shoes two sizes too small. D'oh!
Now this really began to weigh in. How could my son, my 5-yr-old middle baby boy have grown two sizes in shoes since the fall? 4-5 months. YIKES! Has it been so long since I offered shoes to my tikes? Now I am feeling guilty on top of horrified, annoyed and depressed.
My dh likes to remind me that I ask for new shoes every 2-3 months for them, and I like to remind him that he doesn't provide them for 4-6 months. So we're even :) Now I get to remind him WHY they need new shoes every 3 months.
Holy crow.. new shoes, three boys, every three months. That's no less than $90 to $100 each trip or $360-$400 a year! *gulp*
But they MUST have new shoes, and we've tried the Payless stuff and they get nasty faster and just fall apart. So I've taken to buying Nikes, Asics, Adidas and New Balance, on clearance whenever possible, for between $25 to $40 a pair.
Though this time we found a neat little pair of Chuck Taylor's for Jacker for $18, and he calls them his "Spankin' Choo's" since he'd heard me ask him if he wanted to wear his brand spanking new shoes.
But more about that in a minute.
We grabbed a perfect pair of New Balance for Alex and headed off to the Shoe Dept. for Taylor. He'd fallen in love with the Asics at Dick's that were a half size too small, so it was a chore to get him to focus on another pair. But I chose one and he chose one and then watch the sparks fly as he tries to choose between the two.
I hadn't intended to snag a pair for my 2-yr-old, Jack, but I found those Converse All Stars we wore as kids (and my dh still has a double high pair in our closet that are striking teal and school bus yellow.. sighhh) and Jack just looks too cute in alternative style clothes. He already looks like a sk8ter dude :)
So the sale price was tempting ($17.99 I think) and dh can't resist Chuck Taylor's, so off we went.
Now back to my tragedy... how can my children be wearing such huge shoes? They have Flintsones feet! Taylor gained a couple of pounds and it all went to expand his feet, because the rest of him is still skin and bones.
Taylor age 8.5 = size 3.5
Alexander age 5.5 = size 2 (this one is just scary!)
Jackson age 2 = size 9.5
The kids are getting old, and their feet are getting big. At this juncture there will be no more pink and wrinkly feet around this house :(
What will I do without cute shoes????
Friday, March 26, 2004
Inspiration is Fickle
WHAT is it about the shower?! I read somewhere that showers and driving are ultimate thinking and problem solving times because you're doing a brainless activity. Your mind is free to be elsewhere.
Granted, the ideas will come best when you step away from the computer/notebook and clear your head.. but how scary is it that driving is considered brainless? Or worse yet, that it's so TRUE?!
How many times have you all wondered how you made it from point A to point B because you cannot remember a thing about the trip, only what was on your mind.
I know someone who thinks sex with hubby is her best time to think. She says it's a pretty mundane activity. Since I wouldn't admit that even if it were true, and I don't want anyone to hear about my driving, I must admit the shower is the ultimate.
At any rate, I get so aggravated when I come up with a solution or new idea in the shower and there's no way to write it down. I can't scrawl it in shaving gel, since that would require you to actually be an avid leg shaver and have the stuff in the shower (sshh.. I don't even think my husband knows. When hair grows this long on a blonde, it's pretty soft).
I tried to go on strike, but I started to stink.
I was thinking about inventing a water proof mini recorder/ dual shower head for writers that turns on when you start babbling. I could sell the T-shirt too: "I'm a wet writer. Are you?".
It also makes for great black-mail when your unsuspecting guest starts singing show tunes in the shower. Hmm.. maybe I should add an optional camera attachment too.
I wish you all productive showers.
